Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Have You Ever Been to DEE-troit?

Last night, Alan and I had a night out on the town with the "elders."  Mom, Leonard, and my mother-in-law (Mary) went with us to dinner at Red Lobster (Leonard's fav) and then to a movie.  Actually it wasn't just a movie.  It was a showing of the 25th anniversary performance of Phantom of the Opera at Royal Albert Hall complete with curtain call appearances by Andrew Lloyd Webber, Sarah Brightman, and numerous past phantoms.  Amazing.

We arrived at the theatre early so that it wouldn't be "too dark" for Mom to maneuver to her seat.  She likes to sit on one of the top rows because of her macular degeneration.  It takes a village to get her there.

Conversation before the performance started...

Mom:  Did you know that people can steal a baby's identity?!  I don't see how that could be possible!

Me:  Yup.  All a bad guy needs is a social security number and a name to become a complete and total baby.

Mom:  But, babies don't even have social security numbers because they can't work!

Me:  Nowadays, they are born with social security numbers.  If the wrong person gets ahold of it they can totally steal the baby's identity.

Mom:  But, how can they get the social security number if the baby doesn't even know it?!

I kid you not.  At least she busted out laughing after she realized what she said.


Mom:  I saw The Phantom of the Opera at Lincoln Center about six rows from the front!  I liked it almost as much as I liked Lay-Miz-er-AH-bulls!  (A "Frenchman" told her the correct pronunciation.  She refers to Les Mis as often as possible so that she can tell people about the Frenchman.)

Leonard:  I saw The Phantom of the Opera in Baltimore.  It was in New York.  Then, it came to Baltimore.

Mom:  Oh.

Leonard:  Have you ever been to DEE-troit?

Mom:  Yes.  (long pause)  No.  (another pause before she turned to me)  Have I ever been to Detroit?

Me:  Nope.  Unless you went there for some wild girls' weekend that you haven't told me about.

Mom:  (turning to Leonard)  I've never been to Detroit.

Just after the performance began...

[When the show started, the sound was off.  A fellow viewer went and told the management.  The sound came on...really loud.]

Mom:  (leaning towards me and shouting in my ear) Is there somebody named Kristen or Kristine in this?

Me:  Don't know, Mom.  Haven't ever seen it.

Mom:  Well, if you see somebody named Kristen or Kristine, it's the same show I saw at Lincoln Center in New York City.

Me:  Got it!

Then I noticed...

About 10 minutes into the musical, I looked over at Mom to see if she was still awake.  She was wide awake.  With bits of Kleenex wadded up and stuck in her ears.  Our eyes met, and she smiled brightly.

As we were leaving:

Me:  Wasn't that amazing!?

Mom (with Kleenex still in her ears):  It was!  (then, loudly enough for the whole crowd to hear)  I liked Lay-Miz-er-AH-bulls better!!  There was more music.  (don't ask me)  I saw it at Lincoln Center in New York City.

Back at "The Ranch":

The lobby was deserted when we dropped off Mom and Leonard at Raider Ranch.  

Mom:  Don't worry about me.  Leonard will see that I get to my apartment safely.

Leonard:  Do you have your jacket?

Mom:  Yes.

Leonard:  Do you have your scarf?

Mom:  Yes.

Leonard:  Do you have your pocketbook?

Mom:  Yes.

Mom usually goes to bed around 8:30.  She wakes up to go to the bathroom at about 9AM which is when she pushes the Raider Ranch check-in button (ie, the "I'm Still Kickin'" Button).  After checking in, she pads back to her bed, snuggles in and sleeps until 11:00 or 11:30.  I'm sure that she slept until afternoon today after the wild night we had last night.

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